The one where she gets all teary...

My baby starts kindergarten in the morning. I am busily gathering together the last minute necessities - re-packaging her peaches so she can open them up, chilling her apple juice, making sure her jacket and backpack and lunch box are labeled, jotting down the things I need to remind her teacher of when I meet her tomorrow.

I can't believe she's this old. I can't believe five years has gone by so quickly. My beautiful baby has morphed into my beautiful little girl, and in the next blink of my eyes she will be my beautiful big girl and eventually my beautiful adult daughter.

I don't want the time to go. I want to hold her close to me while she's still small enough to fit on my lap, and whisper in her ear for ever how much I love her more than life. I want to always keep her safe in the same way I did when she was tucked away inside of me, nurtured by the very essence of my being.

I can't, though. I must put away my tears and nostalgia and my fear of change and instead dust off my confident smile. I must soothe her trepidations with assurances that I will be there the moment the bell rings to scoop her into my arms and tell her how proud I am of her for being herself.

I don't want her to go.

Saturday Satisfaction: Questions for my readers!

So, I'd like to get to know you guys.  There's 64 of you who think that I write well enough/interestingly enough that you publicly follow me, and often comment.

Do you have kids?  Are they yours biologically?  Were they planned or unplanned?  For those of you who are new, I'll answer my own questions.

I have two children.  Kinder Major is five and will start kindergarten in a week.  Bug just turned nine months.  Both of them are my biological children.  I have not ever had step children or adopted children, nor have I had foster kids.  Someday, I'll be happy to welcome any of the three.  Kinder Major and Bug were surprise babies.  I was on birth control (perfect use,) with both of them.  Kinder Major is a DepoProvera baby, and Bug is an Ortho Tri-Cyclen baby.

What about you?  If you don't have children, do you want some eventually, or are you contentedly child-free?

So this is growing up.

You know, I've spouted often that part of being a parent is growing from the rebirth that occurs when you give birth.  I was smacked upside the head today with a reminder of the things I've spouted.

Just when you become complacent in your ideas and your grudges and your loves, the foundation is shaken, reminding you to never, ever be complacent.

Apologies can be given at the most unexpected times, and so can they be acknowledged, and even granted.  The day we stop surprising ourselves is the day we must sit down and realize that we are no longer truly living.

Be well, my darlings.