The "Woman Child" and my role as one.

I just want to make it boiled-bones clear here.  I do not live with my family because I enjoy it.  I do not live with them because I am afraid to live alone.  I do not live here because I can't hack it in the real world.

I live here because as a single mother to not one, but two special needs children, it is a necessity.  I crunch the numbers on a regular basis, and daydream about paying my own mortgage instead of rent to my parents, and realize that in order for us to survive, I would need to work two to three jobs, and both kids would need daycare.

I'm not willing to put a child who doesn't speak and therefore can't tell me if he's being abused into the hands of strangers.  I'm not willing to put a child with a potentially life threatening condition into the hands of strangers.  It's bad enough that I have to put her in the hands of her teacher every day.  At least, though, that's one room with at least two pairs of adult eyes at all times.  A daycare at her age would mean that she could literally be seizing in a corner and no one would notice because she's a "big kid."

The day will come when I've finished school and have a job that will support the three of us on one single income, and that day will be beautiful regardless of the weather.  Until then, though, we're here.  We're part of a village, my kids get extra love, and whether I like it or not, I've got support when I need it and when I don't.

There's my ground, and I'm standing it.  The rest of you, those holier-than-thou with partners and their own homes who want to write articles, point fingers, or be smug and judgmental can fuck right off.  Go sit in the corner with my ex.