Sunday, April 22, 2012

Happy Earth Day!

It's that day of the year again, where we set aside our normal routines and green things up a bit.  I do, anyway.

One of the things that I believe most strongly in is advocating for those who can't, and that includes our earth.  I don't just do it for myself, though, I do it to get the children involved and teach them a sense of personal responsibility for the planet we live on.

Now, activism with children is not taking them out on a greenpeace boat and attempting to destroy fishing boats and fishing nets.  No, activism can be much more subtle and age appropriate.  Activism is simply taking steps towards restoring and saving the resources we have available to us.

For example, right now in Florida, our groundwater is being tapped and pumped for companies to use for bottled water.  This is causing a multitude of problems, including backflow of rivers into our natural springs, causing "brown outs" of the normally crystalline blue waters.  Kinder Major has become quite the activist, writing letters and sending them to the water management district, the EPA, our governor, and even the private water bottling companies themselves.  She has, in a stroke of child genius, included pictures she's drawn of the fun times she's had in those springs and rivers, and what she feels will happen to them if the continued draws keep occurring.

Activism can be simpler than that, even.  We were briefly involved in a project called "The Need-A-Bag project." The premise was simple - provide reusable shopping bags to the patrons of our local farmer's market.  Due to a lack of response in the area we chose to open our branch we no longer participate, but that small act was activism alone.

If you're the type that is hesitant to go out and be bold due to whatever reason, remember that even the small act of responsibly growing one's own veggies is a form of activism.  Sustainable agriculture, no matter how small, is one of the many ways we as citizens can rebel against large corporations like Monsanto who are intent on dominating the agricultural market.  Growing your own food, visiting farmer's markets, purchasing from local small farmers - those are all ways you can get involved and be part of the global movement.  Not to mention that it's wonderful fun for the kids to get out there and get dirty, after which they get to witness the magic that is a garden- their garden- grow.

Don't have enough land to grow a full garden? No worries.  Pumpkins, squash, tomatoes, berries, radishes, carrots, herbs, and many other edible plants can be easily grown in containers on a back porch or balcony.  If you're unsure of what you need or how to do it, ask here, ask at your local nursery, but do make sure you ask.  There's nothing quite as satisfying as a meal made with the literal fruits of your labor.

Kinder Major starting seeds for pumpkins, green beans, tomatos and squash.

Don't just sit around today, folks.  Get involved.  Get your kids involved.  Go pick up trash in a local preserve, plant a garden, start some seeds, offer up some of your extra re-usable shopping bags at a market.  Do something.  This is our planet and our society.  Use this earth day as a wake-up call and make it count so that EVERY day becomes earth day.

Accidentally Mommy.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Through the looking glass

I wish the world could see my children through my eyes. I also wish that I would remember I feel this way when I'm frustrated or tired.

I posted that on my facebook this morning, and I found myself repeating it over and over like a mantra alll afternoon.

What to do when a child's behavior is off and completely out of control, and out of THEIR control?  How to hold one's tongue and exasperation whilst said child bounds across furniture in a fervor of frenetic energy she has no idea how to control?

This is the medication rollercoaster that I spoke briefly of last post.

So what to do?  How do I help her cope?  How do *I* cope?  There is no warning label that states that I may become frazzled and frustrated with directions on how to reverse the reaction.  There are no wiki-how's on curbing my tongue or her behavior.

Here's what's worked for us so far:  Cuddling.

Lots of cuddling.  When she looks like she's going to shake out of her skin, we sit down for a hug.  When I'm in tears over burning dinner and shouting at her to get off the back of the couch, we sit down for a hug.

Talking it out.  Kinder major is extremely sensitive and understands that some of this is out of her control.  It's therapeutic for her to hear my words when I say that  I understand that she can't help it sometimes.

Space.  Sometimes we just need to walk away from eachother.

At the end of the day, though, we cuddle under the blankets and I do whatever I must between snack and story to make my beautiful children laugh, and I remember why I want the world to see them as I do.  They're brilliant, funny, beautiful little beings.

I'm so blessed to be their mommy.

Saturday, April 7, 2012


So.  It's well past time for me to pull myself up by my bra straps and get out of this funk.

Mind, it's not really a funk about him, though he plays a part in it.  It's more a culmination of being in limbo again as far as where my life is going and what I'm going to be when I grow up, the children and their health and well being, and dissatisfaction with my personal life.

Right now I have an awesome job.  It's nothing fancy, it's sure as hell not glamorous, but it's something I can do and do well, to the point of going home *happy* knowing that I've completed my tasks to the best of my ability, and I truly did an excellent job.  However... there's always a however, it's not something I can or will do for the rest of my life.  I want more.  I want to know that I'm not just doing my job, I'm helping out in the world.  This job could lead to that job.  More limbo, though, as it'll take me quite a bit of time to get there.  I want it, though.  Good god, readers... I want it so much it hurts.  I just don't quite know how to go about finally getting it.

The children are well overall.  Kinder Major has been diagnosed as epileptic, for official and all.  We're on the medication rollercoaster now, and it's wearing me out.  Kinder Major doesn't particularly like the ride, nor does she like the fact that I now watch her like a hawk for signs of seizures.  Helmets are more strictly enforced, and there are days when I'm hesitant to even brush her hair.  She's missed a fair bit of school over this, as well.  I'm keenly aware that it could be worse, though, so I'm thankful daily that it's not.

Bug is doing alright.  Health wise he's perfect, it's his development that I worry for.  I cannot count the number of times I've been asked if he is autistic.  He's not.  He communicates, but doesn't talk, per se.  He has words, but they're still not crystal clear, and most people cannot decipher them, and mistake his speaking for babble.  He also signs to us, and does a good job at it.  He understands EVERYTHING, and is the most social, happy little man.  That doesn't keep me from worrying that he's developed a fibroid in the communication center of the brain, though.  I haven't brought it up to neuro yet - I've been sitting on it, trying to decide if I'm just being a worry wart or if there may be something to the idea.  I'm still unsure.  I wish I had some sort of magic 8-ball for him.

My personal life. Ooooh my personal life.  As you know, Pater Pueri and I have split.  That has left me sad, but I refuse to pine over him, and I'm pretty well moved on.  What makes me sad is that we had this life planned out, we told Kinder Major all about our plans, and now it's been snatched out from under her.  She's left angsty, and I'm left seething over her unhappiness.

As far as what I'm doing now that I'm a free agent... well, I'm looking but not looking hard.  I'm leaving myself open to the universe and whomever may come along. It's interesting to allow myself to openly admire and flirt with another person again, after so long of not being able to, or not wanting to.  It's kind of nice to think about making plans with someone just to get to know them.  While I'm enjoying things, I'm still somewhat intimidated.  I never dated well.  Just ask any of my high school flings.  I wasn't about the dating so much. =P

So that's our lives right now, world.  How are yours?