Saturday, March 27, 2010

Nightmare on Lover's Lane.

Dating.  It is the bane of my single parent existence.  In fact, I don't think I know of any single parent with a child under the age of 18 that doesn't dread the idea of it, in spite of our desires and needs.

So, what's an awesome, off-beat, witty and well rounded single mama like myself to do?

I'll give it to you straight:  I have No.  Freaking.  Idea.

Seriously.  There are hundreds of dating sites dedicated to the specifically single parent demographic, and hundreds more on top of that dedicated to dating in general.  LBGQT single parents, career single parents, Goth single parents, poly-minded single parents - there's something out there for everyone.

I've done the internet dating site thing.  Bug's existence may or may not be directly attributed to a brief relationship with a prime specimen of the psychotic loser that hides it well that your mother always warned you about person met via an online dating site.  Quite frankly, these sites are time consuming and unreliable.  There's far too much room for misrepresentation, especially with the double-edged anonymity the internet affords.

So, where the hell do we go, then?  I'm told that for the religious types that churches often hold socials and mixers aimed at the singles in the congregation, and there have been rumored successes in that venue.  Another one I hear of quite often is the "support group."  Yeah, a little too touchy-feely-playing-nice for me, but hey - if you dig it, it IS a support group for whatever you choose (and some of them are AIMED at single parents!) so theoretically anyone you meet and hit it off with should be totally cool with your maternal/paternal status.

For the rest of us, I suppose we leave it to chance.  Well, chance and self-fulfillment of our needs and desires, self fulfillment from a company (NSFW) that offers a free fulfillment method every few weeks.  (NO affiliation or sponsorship from them, just total devotion to their awesomeness.)

Tell me, readers:  Do you have other suggestions?  Hit by a meteorite or hit by a meteorong methods?  Sage advice, adages or anecdotal examples?  Leave 'em here. :) 


  1. Old school friends! First lovers etc, that's where I would go!

  2. One of Andy's coworkers started dating an old friend as well -- even though a couple months ago when she admitted having a thing for him, he said he couldn't date a woman with a child. Apparently he changed his mind. (He's actually a really nice guy, judging from the few times I've been out to the bars with him.)

    So old flames never hurt, I guess.

    I don't know about advice, but some two years after she was widowed, my mother got a call from a dating service called Together, or somesuch nonsense like that -- offered her a chance to meet 20 men for $2,000. My mother, undoubtedly lonely with three young children, maxes out a credit card. Turns out my stepdad is #5 on the list.

    The kicker is, of course, that my stepdad's application said he wasn't interested in anyone in the military -- my mom was in the AF.

    Thank goodness for cleric errors, I suppose.

  3. I'm sure you can find a single parents night in your area! A lot of them are held at child centered locations and are as good for making friends as finding a date.

    Good luck.

  4. Technically, Bug's other genetic half was someone I briefly knew in high school, and we re-connected through a dating site. Kinda biases me towards both, unfortunately. ;)

    These are some awesome suggestions, though. Despite the occasional itch that needs scratching, I'm not entirely sure I'm brave enough to try any of them. I AM certain that when I do, ya'll will be amongst the first to know. :)